I have a very bad temper, and that's something I have to admit. I throw tantrums like an angry little kid most of the time, and I yell a lot when I'm upset, and sometimes it doesn't even make sense, even to me. I guess I need to attend some anger management classes and therapies. I guess I've hurt a lot of people, and I guess if I say 'I'm sorry' a million times wouldn't even do the justice.
It's becoming a real threat when it starts affecting the relationship I have, or had, with the people around me, especially the ones I care about most. And it's just like some chain reaction thing; one would affect another someway somehow, and later I'd just find myself totally lonesome, yet again. Sometimes the space is exactly what I think I need, but sometimes the silence that I yearn for so much could be consuming; overwhelming even. At that point of my rather conflicted life, I don't even know what to wish for anymore.
But then again, who am I to complain. The devil behind everything bad that could happen to me is none other than myself. In a distorted, unfathomable way, I asked for this. And this, is what I'd get.
Everything is a lesson. And everything, too, happens for a reason. Karma can be a total bitch sometimes, but that's what life is anyway.
